Have you ever been victim to a toxic girl squad? You know what I’m talking about. The ones who just somehow attract negative energy when you’re around them. They are the people you can have a blast with at the bar or talk to about that guy you like but somehow, in the back of your mind you question their intentions.

I’ve had this. Many times.  And most of the time I didn’t even realize I was walking in faulty friendships until they came tumbling down. Maybe I just liked their validation. Maybe being around them made me feel important and more beautiful. But what I didn’t know then is that those friendships were holding me back from being the person I was meant to be.

Toxic friendships hold you back from being the person you are meant to be. Click To Tweet

I know you’re thinking well is it that serious, Alaina? And honestly it absolutely is. I often look at friendships as important as relationships because we rely so heavily on the opinions of those closest to us. We are getting too old to be around people who aren’t contributing to our lives in positive ways. So many times we feel guilty and keep friends around because of history or past memories. Are they helping you get to where you need to be? You have all these dreams and things you want to accomplish but are the actions of you and your friendships supporting that? If for a millisecond you just wanted to say no then here are 5 friends to watch out for:

The Bad Habits Friend – This is very easy to identify but hard to let go. I mean COME ON. You have always been the turn up girls. The ones down for anything. But as you grow and get serious about wanting to live your life in a free and successful mindset, you have to let go of habits that will hold you back. My HUGE habit was gossip. I would get so caught up in talking about other people’s lives that I wasn’t able to focus on growing mine. If your friends make you feel guilty for wanting to change some of your ways then it’s sign #1 that it’s time to move on.

drink, get drunk

The “Girllll, I’ve Got The Tea” Friend – Speaking of gossip…now everyone can be petty. I myself am guilty of this and check The Shaderoom often. But this type of friend thrives on negative outcomes of other people. It’s almost weird. Whether a celebrity or another close friend in the squad, she always finds a way to talk about how bad someone’s life is. And if she will do that with other people bet your bottom dollar she will do that with you. If you find yourself always talking about who slept with who and who’s actually not that cute then it’s time to step away.


The Why You Always Hating Friend – They always have something to say about you and make you feel like the ugliest, worst person in the world. Showed them a new dress? It brings out your back fat. Got a new job? It’s not better than theirs. Watch the people who don’t clap for you. If they are not telling you something out of love then it’s hate. These types of people are actually pretty miserable and want to bring you down to make themselves feel better. Don’t buy into the BS.

mean girls

The Negative, Emotionally Draining Friend – We have all come across that friend that just brings the room down. You barely have your life together but you always find yourself being their full-time therapist. When you hear them start to complain you also start complaining about life too. Maybe to even make them feel better. Be cautious of this. In order to move into your next level in life you can’t bring people along that see life as a burden.


The Competition Friend – Do you have a friend that is always in competition with you? If you say a good thing that happened, she follows up with something better that happened to her. Well here’s some truth – the more you climb the latter and grow, the more this friend will try to “out do” you. It’s draining and unneccessary. Women should praise each other when we do well but if this friend is too worried about looking the best or getting the most attention then it may be time to step back from the friendship.

fake friend

I really could go on and on about toxic people we have to get out of our lives. I learned the hard way that if you don’t step away, these people will continue to blur the way you see and believe in yourself. Could one of these people also be you? Take a step back and analyze if you are doing everything you need to get you to where you want to be. Make adjustments, be free from drama and insert yourself in new and powerful circles. You deserve it.